These ideas will help you freshen your love life.
The following tips come from a FamilyLife resource, Simply Romantic Tips to Romance Your Husband. One free tip before you start—print out this page and keep it somewhere handy for fresh and creative ways of fanning the flames of romance in your marriage.
1. Write him a check for 100 kisses. Be available to cash the check for him when and where he likes.
2. The next time you're out to dinner, casually take out a pen and write a note to him on a paper napkin—letting him know what he can look forward to at home. Fold it and slide it across the table.
3. As he heads out for work, give him a passionate kiss. If he wants to know what it was for, tell him it's the appetizer for tonight's menu.
4. Pamper his tootsies with a relaxing foot massage. All you need is a warm basin of water, some soap, a towel, and some lotion.
5. Get up a few minutes earlier than usual, brush your teeth, then get back in bed and wake him up with a kiss.
6. Refrain from saying "I told you so." That might be the best gift of all.
7. Handwrite his favorite Bible verse on parchment. After laminating it, surprise him by tucking it into his Bible.
8. Have your guy write down on slips of paper his five favorite things to do. Fold them and place them in a bowl. Let him draw one out and read it—then do it together.
9. Blindfold your husband and "kidnap" him. Take him to a hotel room where you have prepared a romantic tryst.
10. Men view romance differently than women. Ask your husband to describe what's romantic to him. Don't be surprised when his ideas sound very different from yours.
Date your wife.
If you asked her out again today, would she still be excited to say yes? You must have been pretty good at this at one time or she wouldn’t have married you! So why stop now? One date a month at a minimum. Use your imagination, get creative, and make it special.
Make her feel special (don’t take the relationship for granted).
“She already knows she’s important to me,” is not a useful response. If you haven’t done something to demonstrate how special she is in the past four hours, then you’ve already waited too long. This is not a high budget item; it’s high consideration item. How about an I love you phone call, a simple card slipped in her purse, a midweek lunch date, or flowers delivered to her office. Do you still open the car door? Serve her hot tea, wash her car, deliver an unexpected embrace, a foot rub, or candles with dinner? You get the idea.
Use some imagination.
Plan events, dates, evenings at home, vacations – even stolen moments – with the kind of creative thinking that motivated you when you first asked her out. There’s a psychological concept known as the “self-fulfilling prophecy.” Simply put: Believe she’s worth the trouble and she will be; stop trying hard and so will she; and bring some creative intention to your romance as if she still knocks your socks off – and she will.
Take care of yourself.
Check the scales, think about how you dress around your wife, throw away the cigarettes, start some regular exercise, don’t be a slob. When she sees you, does she take a second look – or does she look away? Does the way you present yourself tell your wife you want her to be attracted to you or do you take all that for granted?
Say I love you and say it often.
The #1 misnomer believed by unromantic men is this: I shouldn’t have to say it, she should know.
Kindness could well be the “X Factor” in romance. Being kind is underplayed, undervalued, underrated, and certainly underutilized. Want romance? Be Mr. Kindness. Learn to make thoughtfulness and consideration your second nature. Nice guys really do finish first and she’ll fall for you all over again.
Be a gentleman.
Gentlemen are courteous, respectful, well-mannered, faithful, generous, modest, and charming. Stand up when she leaves the table, open the car door, walk on the street side of the walkway, help her on with her jacket, run to the car for her umbrella… you get the picture.
Tell her she’s beautiful.
Women who hear their husband tell them they’re beautiful become more beautiful. Men who tell their wives they’re beautiful believe it with more conviction every time the words leave their lips. Love expressed = beauty; beauty = romance. It’s win-win.
Spend uninterrupted time together.
There are only 168 hours in each week – the number never varies. The amount of time we offer our relationships can appear like a vote as to how much we value the people we say we love. Romance like anything else worthwhile is worth the investment of time and attention.
Pregnancy is supposed to be a joyous time for couples, but this momentous occasion is not always a smooth road. Pregnancy can cause strain in one’s relationship and often times, many physical transformations and emotions that come with pregnancy can result in a woman feeling undesirable or unattractive—hormonal imbalance; morning, afternoon, evening sickness; aching back and swollen feet are just a few examples of common body changes that a woman will go through during her pregnancy. To prevent unwarranted conflict or "sex slumps" during pregnancy, use these tips to stay intimate.
1. Stay Connected During Pregnancy
Women go through a wide range of hormonal changes during pregnancy and, for some lucky couples, this can actually cause their sex lives to become even hotter. However, this isn’t always the case with everyone; many find the fluctuation in hormones create a negative effect on their intimate life. That’s why it’s so important that even before these changes begin to take place you and your partner commit to communicating openly throughout the pregnancy. The key is to be honest with one another from the very start. Couples often expect one another to be clairvoyant, yet the truth is we’re not mind-readers, and during times of transition like these it’s even more vital that you open up about everything you are feeling. It may help to pick out books for your husband to read that will help him to share in the experiences you may be going through. Going through such physical, emotional and mental changes, pregnant women need added support during this time. By focusing on keeping an intimate connection, you are ensuring that you will have the kind of support you need and deserve.
2. Don’t Fear Sex
There are many different issues that can arise during pregnancy and every woman’s circumstances are different; with that being said, you should always check with your health care provider to find out what is safe for you. Once you get the "green light," it’s important to trust your doctor and not let fears or myths stop you from having a healthy and enjoyable sex life throughout your pregnancy!
Also, try Kegeling (naturally tightening and relaxing the muscles, which form part of the pelvic wall regularly); the exercise has many wonderful benefits that:
* Help you to be more orgasmic
* Enhance sexual enjoyment for both partners
* Prevent prolepses of pelvic organs
* Condition muscles making birth easier, and help prevent tears and episiotomies
* Help prevent leaking urine when you sneeze or cough
3. Explore Other Intimate Activities
If you’re not feeling well, let your partner know and be open to exploring other forms of intimacy to maintain that connection. There are so many ways to be intimate with your partner outside of just making love. Read a book together, cuddle during a romantic movie or let him massage and rub your feet—especially when they tend to be swollen from the pregnancy.
4. Get in the Mood
Morning sickness or nausea is often a phase of your first trimester, which will eventually pass. If you are not feeling well, it’s important that your partner is understanding and patient with you. However, if you are feeling well, it’s imperative to make time for intimacy even if you're not "in the mood." With the exception of a health reason specified by your doctor, you should make an effort to be intimate and be careful not to rely on the pregnancy as an excuse to put off spending romantic time with your spouse. Sometimes, women find that they may not be in the mood initially, but if they make time and go with the flow they find they are really enjoying themselves in the process.
5. Be Expressive
A pregnancy is a major life change not just for women, but also for men. There are many reasons that men can become distant or lack desire to have sex—some include fear that they will hurt the baby in some way, or even deeper psychological issues such as the fear they won’t be a good father or won’t be able to handle their new responsibilities. Needless to say, these types of stresses don’t bode well for the kind of relaxed environment that is conducive to an enjoyable intimate experience. Communicate to find out what may be troubling him; a little reassurance can go a long way!
6. Open the Doors of Communication
This is worth repeating! It is vitally important to communicate and set boundaries from the very beginning of what you expect. From the second you realize you are pregnant, you should be talking with one another and emphasizing how important it is to maintain intimacy throughout the first, second and third trimesters—all the way until the baby is born and beyond!
7. Nurture Your Relationship
Make sure that you are not just talking about the baby all of the time. You and your partner have a relationship that is separate from the relationship you will have relative to your child and you need to make sure that you nurture that as well! Establishing the distinction and creating boundaries early could go a long way.